Turning Towards One Another
A place to practice being in community, with presence, courage, and kindness.
Turning Toward One Another are small, in-person gatherings for those who are interested in conversation that feels real, thoughtful, kind and centred on connection with one another.
Gatherings are anchored around a guiding question and move slowly, supported by simple grounding and meditation practices. These gatherings are inspired by Margaret Wheatley’s invitation to create places where we can stay in relationship and connected to each other, even when the world feels fast, fractured and overwhelming.
Here, we practice turning towards one another, instead of turning away so that we might understand each other better, practice deep listening and empathy and sometimes challenge ourselves to sit in discomfort and to be open minded when what we hear from someone else in the room is not the same as what we believe to be true.
There is no pressure to be impressive or insightful, to come prepared or to find the right words. You are invited to come as you are and to discover how it feels and what occurs when we listen with our whole attention.
Why this matters at this time
“We can change the world if we just start listening to one another again. Simple, honest, human conversation. Not mediation, negotiation, problem solving, debate or public meetings. Simple, truthful conversation where we each have a chance to speak, we each feel heard, and we each listen well” Margaret Wheatley
In today’s world of ever increasing chaos and instability set amongst a backdrop of technologies that keep us distracted and disconnected, it’s becoming more important than ever to remember how to talk and listen to one another again. What we need are conversations that invite us to stay curious rather than judgemental and to give attention to what matters. Conversation of this nature is about reclaiming time together, to talk about what is important to us and what we care about.
Most of us are used to conversations that rush toward opinions and solutions; we think ahead to what we are going to say next rather than truly hearing or being heard. Over time, this can leave us feeling unseen or unsure how to express who we really are with others.
Turning Towards One Another offers something different.
When we slow down, bring awareness to our bodies and practice active listening, the conversation becomes more spacious and reflective. People then feel more courageous speak from deeper places and a sense of shared humanity begins to reveal itself.
These gatherings don’t erase our differences, they actually give us a way to meet in spite of them. They remind us that we are not alone and that beneath our varied stories, many of our longings are the same.
How are the conversations hosted?
Conversations will begin by bringing awareness to the body through a short guided meditation which will aim to bring us back to centre and to feel more grounded.
Each conversation will flow in its own unique way, however the structure provided is as follows:
A conversation starter is introduced, accompanied by a short essay or reading to reflect upon.
An explanation and demonstration of active listening will be provided.
We take turns speaking.
If the conversation becomes rushed or emotionally charged, we notice, pause, ground again, and continue.
My role is to hold the shape of the conversation; to tend the pace, protect the gentleness, and create a container where everyone feels safe to speak or to remain quiet.
Margaret Wheatley sets out some principles that she uses when practicing conversations in community which we will use to guide us in our conversations:
we acknowledge one another as equals
we try to stay curious about each other
we recognise that we need each other’s help to become better listeners
we remember that conversation is the natural way humans think together
we expect it to be messy at times
Over time, trust grows. People begin to understand that their presence not their performance is what matters here.
Practical Details
Turning Towards One Another conversations are designed to be held as small, in-person gatherings.
To be held once a season
Each session includes grounding, a conversation starter, and shared conversation
Booking is required, and spaces are limited
Sessions are paid per gathering
These gatherings will be offered locally in the Reigate area. If you’re interested in participating, the exact venue and dates will be shared here shortly. Please contact me here if you would like to register your interest.
If you’re part of a community organisation, workplace, or local group and feel this kind of conversation could support your people, I’d be glad to talk about facilitating a session for you. Please reach out to me to discuss your needs.
How might you begin
If you feel drawn to join a conversation, or to host a gathering, you are warmly invited to reach out to me with questions or curiosity. Or if you would simply like to register your interest please get in touch via my contact form by clicking here.
Inspired by the work of Margaret J. Wheatley and her invitation to ‘turn toward one another.”